Hey, kalm!

[Ivytalk]

Do you have any JPMorganChase in your portfolio?

I imagine they're looking for a few new traders, if you're tired of your day job.

[andy7171]

Kalm is busy becoming a gelding today. Try back later.

[93henfan]

He said "gelding".

[andy7171]

He said "gelding".

Wouldn't it be funny if kalm comes back posting like SuperHorney?

[grizzaholic]

He said "gelding".

Wouldn't it be funny if kalm comes back posting like SuperHorney?

Or if there happens to be a slip, he could come back posting like PFL.

[kalm]

My nut hurts.

[grizzaholic]

My nut hurts.

I hear drinking helps. Or you could take nice long jog to clear your head.

[kalm]

My nut hurts.

I hear drinking helps. Or you could take nice long jog to clear your head.

Tell Ivy to say hello to his boy Jamie Dimon for me. I'm too high on hydro to type.

[Grizalltheway]

I hear drinking helps. Or you could take nice long jog to clear your head.

Tell Ivy to say hello to his boy Jamie Dimon for me. I'm too high on hydro to type.

Drugs are bad, mmmmk?

[andy7171]

My nut hurts.

I think you should have had both disconnected.

[kalm]

My nut hurts.

I think you should have had both disconnected.

Only got one due to testicular cancer. Doc felt bad for not charging half price but said the insurance company wouldn't accept it.

[andy7171]

I think you should have had both disconnected.

Only got one due to testicular cancer. Doc felt bad for not charging half price but said the insurance company wouldn't accept it.

Really though, it's just one snip. Not like he did any less work.

[death dealer]

My nut hurts.

Oh quit your bellyaching you big girly man! I did mine sans anesthesia, and I have both my nuts!


















No, seriously, local wore off about halfway through the procedure. I declined the second shot in my nut sack. Bad decision.

[kalm]

So Ivy, is Dimon a hero?

Here's Jamie

After losing $2.2 billion (and rapidly rising) in mark-to-market losses in credit derivatives, the multi-trillion dollar global product JPMorgan created and claims it manages well, Dimon had the perfect response on yesterday's Meet the Press to straight man David Gregory's question: "How did this happen?"

"First of all, there was one warning signal -- if you look back from today, there were other red flags. That particular red flag -- you know, we made a mistake, we got very defensive and people started justifying everything we did. You know, the benefit in life is to say, 'Maybe you made a mistake, let's dig deep.' And the mistake had been brewing for a while, so it wasn't just any one thing."1

That's so funny I'll bet President Obama blew coffee out of his nose.

The Pay Joke

In 2011, Jamie Dimon got a total pay package of $23 million. Of course, those earnings came on the back of a global financial bailout, Fed enabled mergers that created an insanely big balance sheet, and ongoing cheap financing from the Fed. Meanwhile, U.S. savers get paid virtually no interest on low-risk investments to subsidize the banking system.

Dimon's pay partly depended on reported profitability of the division with the troubled credit derivatives, JPMorgan's Chief Investment Office (CIO). Dimon reportedly paid its chief investment officer, Ina Drew, $14.5 million in 2011. Dimon just allowed Drew to retire. Dimon paid Bruno Iksil, one of the traders in the unit, $100 million.

The Model Joke

The thing about credit derivatives is that the models are very vulnerable to the assumptions one uses in the model. So you wouldn't want to say, push your people to make more money for JPMorgan and then let the people whose multi-million dollar bonuses depend on the outcome influence the assumptions. But that's only if you don't have Dimon's flair for comedy.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/janet-tav ... 17332.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[Ivytalk]

So Ivy, is Dimon a hero?

Here's Jamie

After losing $2.2 billion (and rapidly rising) in mark-to-market losses in credit derivatives, the multi-trillion dollar global product JPMorgan created and claims it manages well, Dimon had the perfect response on yesterday's Meet the Press to straight man David Gregory's question: "How did this happen?"

"First of all, there was one warning signal -- if you look back from today, there were other red flags. That particular red flag -- you know, we made a mistake, we got very defensive and people started justifying everything we did. You know, the benefit in life is to say, 'Maybe you made a mistake, let's dig deep.' And the mistake had been brewing for a while, so it wasn't just any one thing."1

That's so funny I'll bet President Obama blew coffee out of his nose.

The Pay Joke

In 2011, Jamie Dimon got a total pay package of $23 million. Of course, those earnings came on the back of a global financial bailout, Fed enabled mergers that created an insanely big balance sheet, and ongoing cheap financing from the Fed. Meanwhile, U.S. savers get paid virtually no interest on low-risk investments to subsidize the banking system.

Dimon's pay partly depended on reported profitability of the division with the troubled credit derivatives, JPMorgan's Chief Investment Office (CIO). Dimon reportedly paid its chief investment officer, Ina Drew, $14.5 million in 2011. Dimon just allowed Drew to retire. Dimon paid Bruno Iksil, one of the traders in the unit, $100 million.

The Model Joke

The thing about credit derivatives is that the models are very vulnerable to the assumptions one uses in the model. So you wouldn't want to say, push your people to make more money for JPMorgan and then let the people whose multi-million dollar bonuses depend on the outcome influence the assumptions. But that's only if you don't have Dimon's flair for comedy.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/janet-tav ... 17332.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Never said he was. I don't have that stock in my portfolio. I don't believe in investing in companies that took bailouts. Nor do I invest in tobacco companies.