So these Jehovah's Witnesses came up to my door an hour ago...
Me: Please show me your permit to knock on our doors in this neighborhood.
Them (Really, just, her): We don't need a permit.
Me: Sorry, you have to have a permit. Get back in your car and leave this neighborhood or I will call the police.
Her: We don't need to permit, Jehovah's has gone to court and we're allowed to spread our word.
Me: Sure you are. Everyone is allowed to do their thing. But, you still need to obtain a permit to go from door to door in this neighborhood. The Administration building is just up the road and across the street...you'll need to show ID in order to get into the office area, but I'm sure you won't have a problem with that. Now, go away or I will call the police and have you removed.
Her: Why are you acting this way? We just want to give you some information?
Me: Sure...all thieves and nut jobs are selfish...it's all about what YOU people want. Have you ever considered my wants? No, you haven't.
I want some peace and quiet...I don't want to be disturbed by clown posses coming up to my door. You could be trying to distract me at the door, while one of your people goes around back, breaks in, and steals all my stuff.
Me, screaming to the guy at the end of my driveway, and the other guy, only 5 feet behind the woman : HEY YOU...GET AWAY FROM THAT CAR! AND YOU, STEP FORWARD AND KEEP IN MY SIGHT. DON'T TRY TO SNEAK AROUND BACK WHILE THIS LADY BOTHERS ME!
The lady in front of me: But...
Me: Don't interrupt...it's rude. I wasn't finished. If you had a permit, you'd have no problem showing me your permit and it would put my mind at ease. Then I'd be able to tell you to go away in a calm, fashion. But right now, I don't know if you are a bunch of gypsies trying to take advantage...HEY, YOU...I TOLD YOU TO GET AWAY FROM MY CAR! DON'T MAKE ME COME OVER THERE! YOUR FANCY CLOTHES AREN'T FOOLING ME.
Now, where were we? Yes, if you had a permit, I'd be able to calmly tell you that you are a bunch of nut jobs...but nut jobs who went through the proper process. You and your friends seem to be too rude to be God's people. Now, do you have a permit, or shall I call the police on you?
They got back in their car and away they went.